April Fool’s Day (April 1) is the year’s, second most, prankish day. (The first, most prankish day is Halloween.) April 1, 2013 will arrive. Chicago’s golfers will golf. Chicago’s golfers will be April fools if they:
- If they believe all fairways are fair ways. Some fairways will be so muddy that golfers will be unable to maintain firm stances. Herring Gulls and Canada Geese will be blocking their progress.
- If they believe Forest Preserve Golf management named Chick Evans Golf Course to honor a giant chick. (A giant chicken occasionally appear on Family Guy, but he is too uncivilized to play golf. Fast food restaurants that serve chicken are not nearby. )
- If they believe all, Chicago Heights golf courses are in the Illinois Mountains. Cartographers and geologist recognize Illinois for its flatness, (former prairies). Nonetheless, Illinois has many hills, but no mountains.
- If they believe that all golfers who intend to play Tam O’Shanter Golf Course must wear tam-o’shanters. Tam-o’-shanters are not as effective as sombreros when shielding golfers’ faces from the sun. However, if you are friends with a haberdasher, you may be able to purchase tam-o’-shanters and sombreros (They cost more than baseball caps and visors.) at bargain prices and wear them while playing golf at this course.
- If they believe parts of Christopher Columbus’ ships are scattered throughout Chicago Park District’s Columbus Park Golf Course. Golfers, who play on this course, may have playing partners with the names of Niña, Pinta and Santa Maria. This course is always open on Columbus Day.
- If golfers believe that only meadowlarks fly overhead at Meadowlark Golf Course, they are April fools. It is extremely likely that golfers playing this course will see Canada Geese, Herring Gulls, crows, grackles, sparrows, etc. Meadows may be nearby into which meadowlarks may lark.
- If they believe that golfers who intend to play at the Cog Hill Golf Facility must wear cog-heeled, golf shoes. Robot golfers with certain ambulatory specifications may need to wear cog-heeled, golf shoes. However, Cog Hill management will not allow robot golfers on their courses.
- If they believe that River Oaks Golf Course has rivers. River Oaks Golf Course has numerous oak trees, but no rivers. Its several water hazards are ponds and streams. (More water hazards are on the front nine holes than there are on the back nine holes.)
- If they believe that the snack shop at Burnham Woods Golf Course only serves burned, ham sandwiches. This snack shop probably will let you order a burned, ham sandwich, but that is not the norm. They do serve potato chips, candy bars, soda, sports drinks and bottled water.
April 1, 2013 Title Slide
The sponge filter that I used on this photo is symbolic for the month of April because during Chicago’s golf season, which is normally April-November, Chicago receives most of its rainfall. Of course, golf course personnel do not use sponges to soak up the water.
The game of golf is rarely fair. Besides birds in the fairways, there are sometimes uprooted, tree stumps; thick layers of fallen leaves (in November); sharp doglegs; tall, green willow trees that overhang the fairways; and firm, deep sand bunkers.
Chick Evans was a U.S. Golf Amateur Champion. He was other than a giant chick. Golfers may see some bird chicks on this course that are young-lings of robins, grackles, geese, etc.
Chicago Heights, Illinois has two golf courses of which I am aware. However, mountains do not exist anywhere in Illinois. This mountain side is in Idaho.
I believe that Payne Stewart, the professional golfer, wore a tam while playing in the PGA Tour. However, rarely, if ever, will you see any golfers wearing tams on any Chicago-land golf course.
Ships of CHristopher Columbus
In 1492, Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue. This explorer definitely did not explore Illinois. It is also unlikely that any remains from his ships, wherever they may be, have found temporary resting sites at Chicago’s Columbus Golf Course.
I am unsure of the sound that a meadowlark makes. However, if these birds hang around Meadowlark Golf Course, they will need to share the course with other birds.
Cogs Heels Soes
Cogs are unfit to replace golf shoes’ spikes. However, robot golfers, if golf course management allowed these automatons to play on their courses, would probably benefit from cogs on their feet.
Joe Louis Entrance Sign
Joe Louis Golf Course is in Riverdale, Illinois. This is a nearby suburb of Chicago. If you see Joe Louis in the background, you probably require contact lenses or eyeglasses.
River-River Oaks Golf Course
Rivers are not part of the layout at River Oaks Golf Course in Calumet City, Illinois. The fourth hole (showing in the right photo) has a large pond that is a lateral water hazard. The photo on the left depicts the Missouri River.
Burned Ham-Burnham Golf Course
Although it is possible that the cook at Burnham Golf Curse will prepare for you a burned, ham sandwich, do not bet your last cent on it. After all, they have a certain reputation to maintain.